Sunday Synopsis

Things to know when your friend loses a baby–  oh how much I like this article.  I”m impressed I”m seeing more babyloss stuff on Huffington Post, well done HP! I have totally lost some people in my life because being with me in grief is hard, and many didn’t know how to handle me.  What would you add?

10 things People Hate about Funerals- Having hosted a funeral of the most sensitive kind, you would think I’d have mastered the art of attending others.  But no, I still feel awkward and want to make sure I do/say the right thing.  I do know how important it is to go, though, and how priceless are the words “I’m so sorry for your loss.” Have you been to a funeral since your own loss?  Do you still have discomforts about going? Knowing what to say? How to dress?


And because it’s SuperBowl Sunday here in the states, and my team is favorited, despite some recent controversy, here’s this just for fun!

6 thoughts on “Sunday Synopsis

  1. Thank for sharing that first huff post blog post. I loved it! I only wish it had been published sooner so that I could have sent it to family and friends to help them better understand what I was grieving.

  2. I think I was expecting the 10 things People Hate about Funerals to be sincere advice on how to handle a funeral or how to help others attending a funeral you are hosting to be more supportive. Although I did find myself laughing at points of this article, I found it a bit offensive and unproductive. Our society already favors people to be awkward around death and to not know how to support beavered families. Why promote that even for the sake of comic relief? This article was not very helpful for any future funeral I would have to attend or host.

    • hmm, I didnt quite look at it that way. from that perspective, I can see how unhelpful the article can be. Personally it simply made me think about my own experience with funerals- which I suppose thankfully is little- grandparents, a coworker’s husband, my baby (obviously a big one) a friends baby. But depsite having hosted one and having been so close to death- I amazed at how uncomfortable I can still be around them. I now know how important it is to go, because its not about me, its about the bereaved and the deceased. I hope I didnt offend- I posted it becuase it got my mind rolling about funerals in general.

  3. K’s aunt died three weeks after Ander, and we headed to DC for the funeral. We didn’t have a funeral for Ander, just a memorial service in the summer (six months later), so this was the first big family event we went to after he died. It came so hard on the heels of grief; we were both very close to her aunt (K probably most of all in her family, as we used to live very close to her and saw her most weeks for tea or dinner). It was a double whammy and definitely prolonged the deeper part of our grieving. The funeral was lovely in some ways, though, with a computer slideshow of pictures from her entire life. The hard part was that her son is kind of a screw up (his family too) and they of course commanded the most of the attention from the mourners, when really it was K who was closer to her aunt. Her son hadn’t even visited in the hospital, while K was the one who drove her there. So that was hard, to feel like second-class mourners.

    • interesting concept- the second class mourners. I feel like I’ve read an article (post? forum?) about those seeking attention, especially when it takes support away from the truly bereaved- not those that just want the spot light.

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