Last year my New Years facebook post was
“2013, you were rough. 2014, who knows what you will bring,”
and I linked my blog publically for the first time. Now that a full year has passed, I keep thinking how I want to reflect on the past year and approach this new year. 2014 brought me Mabel, which of course was wonderous. But save for a few moments when I thought she might actually live it was so very painful. It was a dark dark year for me, despite the outpouring of love and support I received in the wake of my daughter’s death. I still have thoughts that I’m ashamed of. I still have trouble letting myself be happy. I could go on enumerating all the wonderful things people have done in memory of Mabel and in support of Chris and I. I could further go on listing all the struggles I have had. But right now, after a multi day GI virus and the fatigue of the first holidays without my girl (hence the blogging absence), I am tired. So today I simply sum up my thoughts on the changing of the years.
2014, you were rough. 2015 please be kind.