Day 26: Healing Ritual

I have lots of healing to do.  Too much anger and bitterness.  I work with my therapist several times a month on such things.  Before pregnancy I worked with her on my anxiety and some compulsions I had and then in pregnancy she worked with me on my fear of miscarriage and stillbirth and the anxiety around the unknown and poor prognosis my baby was given.  Sometimes we simply did talk therapy and sometimes she worked with me on techniques to deal with my anxiety.  What do you do when your anxiety is justified?  In pregnancy, mine was.  We worked on distraction- it was the best tool I had when things got bad.

There is no set ritual I have, especially nothing I haven’t already mentioned- exercise, puppy, puzzles, etc.  My ritual differs everyday.  My ritual is distraction.

Today my distraction was a book group outing to the farm.  One of our members moved to a quiet corner of the state and we visited her new house (old farm house) and met her new husband and acquired furry family.

#CaptureYourGrief

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4 thoughts on “Day 26: Healing Ritual

  1. Wow, what beautiful animals! Nature is the best and the worst – in a lot of ways, stupid nature let us down :-/

    I used to meditate to cope w pregnancy anxiety… Unfortunately I’m now afraid that trying to distract myself (and being told by doctors/nurses that my anxiety was the real problem at hand) contributed to Sacha’s lack of diagnosis and subsequent poor care 😦 My therapy homework this weekend has been to try NOT to distract myself from my anger about Sacha’s care… It hasn’t been fun. But in my case, until I work through it, my anger about the situation – and my fear of that anger – will keep me trapped in anxiety. Ufff.

    • ooo, such hard therapy- to be with your emotions. sometimes I’m told to do that too. I was an excellent student in school, so it’s hard for me to not do my homework, but sometimes I dont do that one. it’s a hard one!

  2. I wish I had a therapist like yours… mine seems to think that if my anxiety isn’t affecting my ability to carry on with daily habits, then I shouldn’t worry about it. I gave up on her but still haven’t managed to look for anyone else.

    • what? now that’s a crazy therapist!! I”m fortunate that I had my therapist for years before I dealt with this. I was working with her on what I now consider “little” anxiety. SOme of it was related (will I find a husband ever?–> translates into will I ever find a partner and settle down so I can start a family???) and some of it I now think of as nonsense. But she stuck with me through it all. I hope you eventually find your match. i tell my pts, finding a therapist is kind of like dating- you sometimes have to kiss a lot of frogs!

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