Day 8: Resource

I walked into a Hope After Loss (formerly Hygeia) support group meeting ten days after Mabel died.  I paused in the hallway outside the door, crying and holding Chris’s hand.  I knew I needed to go in, but I cried out of fear and sadness.  I sat on the couch that first meeting and got to tell my story from the beginning.  Several meetings later I found myself among a group of women who became friends, some of who I check in with almost daily.  At a meeting a month later, one looked at me and said, “it’s good to see you smiling,” as I walked in.  Only in that place, among those people, would I have welcomed such a comment.  Anywhere else, I would have felt guilty or the need to explain that despite my momentary smile, I was still very very sad.  But not there.

This past weekend we walked in Hoe After Loss’s annual Footprints on Our Hearts walk, where I was the third highest individual fundraiser (thanks to many of you!).  I was joined by many friends, the babylost and not, surrounded by love and support on a day to remember Mabel and all babies gone too soon.




4 thoughts on “Day 8: Resource

  1. How nice to have a support group. That’s something I wish I had. People are very nice for the first month or two, then no one wants to talk to you any more. I don’t have a lot of time to even spend much “Internet community” time, so mostly I’m just on my own. All the time.

    • oh how frustrating! I read about your lack of internet and it makes me sad- and recognize how fortunate I am to have access (perhaps too much access at times- I think chris sometimes thinks so). know that when you are not online, I’m thinking about you!

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